Chastity Training: 10 Kinky Reasons for It

Chastity training is one of my favorite kinky topics. On today’s podcast episode, I talk about why I love putting my submissives into chastity. You might be surprised at some of my reasons!

Listen to this episode here on iTunes.

I also have an exciting announcement: I’ve just started a Patreon! Join me there for access to my kinky erotic audio stories and special rewards for my patrons. Visit here to learn more: Patreon.com/Zahvia

My BDSM Philosophy

Podcast episode: Many people have a misunderstanding about BDSM and assume it’s just whips, chains and heartlessness (or worse, get their information from mainstream media). They might also mistakenly assume all Dominants work the exactly same. Let me guide you through my philosophy and practice of BDSM as a Dominatrix – from the sexy and merciless aspects, to the nurturing and practical aspects.

Listen here or via my channel on iTunes.

Live Podcast Tonight & Tomorrow

This is from my current newsletter. If you’d like to be on my mailing list, sign up here.

Hello my fellow kinkster,

Since this is my first newsletter, I should probably reintroduce myself to you. My name is Zahvia and I am a BDSM Dominant. If you subscribed a long time ago and wondered “why did I never receive a newsletter update?” – worry not, this is the first.

(Some of you may also remember me by my former name, Lexi Lipstick.)

If you’re anything like me, you’ve been feeling stressed about the ongoing horrific events in the U.S. Because of this, I’m feeling inspired to be vocal in the opposite direction and put out some positive, sexy energy into the world. I’ll be live broadcasting 3 new podcast episodes over tonight and tomorrow. Join me if you’d like to hear my thoughts on kink, encouragement, experience a sensual body exercise or listen to my guidance on feminization (see schedule below).

Admittedly, I also thought it’d be cool to do this around the eclipse because I’m woo like that.

Private Phone and Video Chat

I’m also offering private phone and video chat sessions this week. If you pre-book, you’ll receive a special rate. Reach out if you’d like to receive support, encouragement and/or enjoy some genuine kink play. Details can be found here.
Live Podcast Details

All you need to do to enjoy the podcast is visit the link below. This series is completely free. You don’t need to sign up. I know this is short notice, but I’ll be recording it, so it will stay available at the link below. This is a gift to you and anyone you’d like to share it with. If you’d like to offer something back in gratitude, I will happily receive it via my website, but there is no requirement. Please enjoy!
Click HERE to listen

**All times are Eastern Daylight Time**

Sunday, Aug. 20th  |  11:30p-12a
My BDSM Philosophy

Join me as talk about BDSM from my perspective – both the sexy aspects and the potential for deep life enhancement.

Monday, Aug. 21st  |  2:30p-3p
Eclipse Encouragement Talk and Sensual Body Exercise

Times have been difficult for many. Let me remind you how soothing it can feel to tap into your sensuality. I’ll be guiding you through a sensual exercise during the second half (not explicitly sexual, but probably NSFW).

Monday, Aug. 21st  |  9p-9:30p
How to Explore Feminization in 10 Steps
The art of being femme is a favorite topic of mine. I’m going to guide you in how to start and how to deepen your exploration of femme. *Note: this is open to people of every gender identity*

Talk to you soon! And remember, the episodes will stay up at this link if you can’t make the live broadcast.

In Sweet Divine Kink,
Zahvia

Positively Sexual Festival

FREE WORKSHOP! Join me and learn the art of Sexual Role Play;) This Sunday, Dec. 14, 2014 in Berkeley, CA at the Positively Sexual Festival!

My workshop is from 2:30p-3:45p. Come by earlier and you’ll also catch Andy Duran from Good Vibrations teach about Giving the Gift of Pleasure (1p-2:15p).

Come to the after party,a Frisky Affair, from 7p-11p! Cocktails, food, music, burlesque and glass blowing demos. Positively Sexual Festival is a big annual event put on by Fucking Sculptures, makers of seriously sexy and high-end glass dildos.

Location:

Berkeley Bohemian Glass
701 Bancroft Way, Berkeley, CA 94710
7 – 11pm

For more info: http://positivelysexualfestival.tumblr.com/workshops

See you then!

New Podcast!

Come join me and listen to my brand new podcast, Lexi Lipstick: a Dominant Discourse on BDSM, Fetish & Sexuality. From my experience as a Dominant, my training as a sex educator and my love for sharing sexy stories, I’ll be covering topics that many people consider taboo. Here is the first episode, which is just a teaser of what’s to come. Stay tuned…

Session Music: Goldfrapp

One of my favorite things is the way music can bring inspiration to sessions. It can play such an important part in a successful play scene, don’t you think? The wrong music, something too contradictory, can kill a scene. But the right kind, one in harmony with the energy or even instigating through its melody, can help make for a truly memorable time.

This evening I’m listening to Goldfrapp’s Felt Mountain. It’s one of my very favorite albums. I love how trippy, sparkly and sultry it is. It brings to mind a fantasy that would go a little something like this:

I’ll ease you in with heavy tease and denial, my feminine curves taunting you, my soft skin serenading you and the light scent of my perfume confusing your will into submission. Before you know it you’re on your knees. Your body quivers as you feel my breath on your skin. My brown eyes stare into yours and I see into to the depths of you. There’s no use in fighting it. You start to go down with the obedience of a trusting child. This, of course, is just the beginning.

I move you into light corporal punishment, though slow at first so that I can savor your flesh beneath me. You’re warm to the touch as blood races through your veins, excited by the nearness of me. You are my prized possession. Rhythmically I build you into an arc of sensuous pain; the sting of my hand on your bare ass a divine caress. Each time I make contact with your body, you find yourself wanting more. And more, and more.

And then…

Well, I don’t tell all of my secrets. But be assured, my sweet, that you’ll find yourself in a most decadent space – deep, floaty and transcendent. Come let me feast on you. Your body and my Dominance will merge into an orchestra of the senses.

Xx,

Mistress Lexi

Tight Rope and Hard Spankings

What is it about kinky desire? I certainly have it and have played with many people who enjoy this kind of sexuality. There’s all sorts of BDSM play – spanking, rope bondage, flogging, caning, feminization and on and on. Of course, not every kink is for every person. It’s beautifully amazing, however, to see how much people reveal to me about their kinky desires if just given the room to feel safe in their disclosures. I don’t take these admittances for granted. Actually it’s quite the opposite: to those who share with me their kinkiest secrets, I am thankful and feel honored.  I know it’s not always an easy thing to do and I appreciate those who do enough self-inquiry to be able to name what it is that they want. Furthermore, being in the presence of someone who can politely request and wholeheartedly receive is an awesome space.

At the recent Lusty Lady holiday party I had the privilege of experiencing my first rope suspension with Dan of the Two Knotty Boys. Holy hell, it was a lot more intense than I thought it would be. I’ve experienced rope bondage before, which is intense enough, but had never been suspended. It was painful, it was pleasurable and seriously sensual. Dan was attentive to my physical and mental state & responded quickly when I reached my limit…not to mention that he created an exquisite rope design on my body! It was an experience that I was glad I had. The night proceeded to get kinkier and kinkier with my fellow Lusty Ladies and guests, which was fabulous. My love to consensually dominate took over & I’ll just say that it got very hot in that club.

Which leads me back to my original musing: from what place do these kinky proclivities arise? I cannot answer that question for anyone but myself and truly, I feel that I am still exploring it. Of course, there exists in humans the capacity for pleasurably intense physical sensations. Beyond that, I’ve pondered historical non-consensual power play & wonder about the potential for power reclamation through kink. Our human history is not exclusively progressive and happy – it’s also filled with pain, sorrow and abuses. How can we not have that complex past embedded in our collective psyche, to say nothing of the current state of the world and on an individual level, the current state of each of our lives? It is a brave choice to jump into this human experience.

My practice of BDSM, exploring both dominant and submissive roles, has brought me to some powerful places that oftentimes, quite frankly, feel transcendent. In the midst of an intense kink scene there is no room for the existence of anything other than me, my partner(s), our histories, our desires and the tasks at hand: to feel, risk, ask, receive and live. And to that, I would also add the task of dying. The French metaphorically describe orgasms as “la petite mort” (the little death) and I believe the same sentiment can apply to a well-negotiated and well-played kink scene; gone are the initial worries, the menial trials of the day and opened are the spirits, the bodies and the minds. Fears can be surpassed and new conceptual spaces can unfold from the most tucked away corners of existence.

During a talk I attended last year by Cléo Dubois, I was introduced to the the idea of BDSM play as a form of ritual. I loved that thought and have drawn upon it many times. Whether intentionally or haphazardly engaged, we are all experiencing many types of rituals everyday. It is with great reverence and joy that I choose to experience the ritual of kink play. For it’s eroticism, for it’s transcendent potential, for it’s pleasure, for it’s pain and for the journey I can take in the presence of kink, I will continue to enact these rituals. And of course, being a supportive pervert, I will continue to welcome those who desire the firm touch of my paddle. With every smack on the ass, I will (quietly) cheer my submissives on in their journey of authentic deviance.